Tag Archives: Poetry

Elegy for Mom

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My sister said I should post this. I wrote it right after Mom died. She suffered from mental illness for most of my life, and passed away from complications due to Huntington’s disease.

 

 

 

 

Mom–

You were my idol

You were a voodoo queen

An earth goddess

A diva

A madwoman

A sophisticate

A saint

Always with a touch of the divine

Though everything you said was unreal

You never lied

You were fragile

And strong

And so much a part of me.

I used to envy the kids who had normal moms

Even the adults who complained about their aging parents

But these days I know better.

You taught me how to wear my crazy well

You were a fast friend

And a devoted parent through the last moment of your life

Often you were

So much more than human.

I battle myself not to be like you

I push myself to be more like you

You were a dark enigma

Yet transparent as light

Gentle yet terrifying

When you lived I couldn’t handle the pain of your existence

Now that you’ve died I find the absence hard to bear.

I once thought I took more care of you than you did of me

But today I understand what you sacrificed to protect your children.

Your laugh echoes in my empty heart

Your spirit derails me still

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Another one for Mom

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Mom

Was it four years ago

Only four

When you were in the kitchen, insisting on helping with the dishes

You took so long

Running the disposal dry for minutes at a time.

 

Was it three years ago

Only three

In the cold, you in your green trenchcoat and walker

And I took you to a Chinese restaurant

For your latest obsession, orange chicken.

You hugged the waitress and told her you loved her.

 

Was it two years ago

Only two

When I was feeding you ice cream in bed

Sugar free, but we didn’t tell you that.

You ate it all, every time if I let you.

You told us you weren’t sick.

 

Was it one year ago

Only one?

We’d asked you if you were done with meds

And you nodded an emphatic yes

One of the last things you said.

We held your blue fingers

And watched you fade.

 

I miss you

I miss you

I hated to see you suffer

I was glad you got to go

But I still miss you.

Days go by

I’ve made new friends

I’ve found new joys

I am blossoming in new ways

You would be proud

You were always proud.

I haven’t missed out on anything

But I miss so much.

 

You were always easy to talk to

You knew things

I bet everything I have uncovered for myself

You already knew.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Still under construction

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The decades-long effort of thousands of knowledgeable programmers has culminated in the creation of the incredible powerhouse tool that is CSS3. Dynamic websites, beauties untold, unlimited creative expression is at my fingertips.

And still my website looks like it came straight out of 1991. Pffft!

I’ll get there… eventually. Once I figure out what I’m doing. Check out that sweet color gradient y’all.

 

 

 

 

A red brick path flanked by grassy green yard

Sometimes the things humans make aren’t so bad.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Maintenance

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I missed a couple of posts because of Labor Day, or at least that was the plan, but then our Internet broke. So I missed a couple of posts because the Internet broke. That’s a better excuse.

 


day by day
I decay
pieces of me
fall away

clip

what once was white
now is yellow

clip

wash away
the filth
smooth
the jagged edges

clip

again I look
fresh, young

clip

appearances
can be deceiving

 

 

 

I was clipping my toenails and I thought, wouldn’t it be funny to write a poem about something as dumb as clipping your toenails? And then I thought, it would be even funnier if it was actually good… let’s give it a shot. This was the melodramatic result.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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